HUMOR

As the name suggests, this page will present on a regular basis, probably weekly, items which tickled the fancy of the webmaster. Hope you enjoy it.

A blonde city girl named Amy marries a Colorado rancher.                 
                                                                           
  One morning, on his way out to check on the cows, the rancher says to     
  Amy,                                                                     
                                                                           
  'The insemination man is coming over to impregnate one of our cows today,
  so I drove a nail into the 2 by 4 just above where the cow's stall is in 
  the barn. Please show him where the cow is when he gets here, OK?'       
                                                                           
  The rancher leaves for the fields. After a while, the artificial         
  insemination man arrives and knocks on the front door.                   
                                                                           
  Amy takes him down to the barn. They walk along the row of cows and when 
  Amy sees the nail, she tells him, 'This is the one right here.'           
                                                                           
  The man, assuming he is dealing with an air head blonde, asks, 'Tell me   
  lady, 'cause I'm dying to know; how would YOU know that this is the right
  cow to be bred?'                                                         
                                                                           
  'That's simple," she said. "By the nail that's over its stall,' she       
  explains very confidently.                                               
                                                                           
  Laughing rudely at her, the man says, 'And what, pray tell, is the nail   
  for?'                                                                     
                                                                           
  The blonde turns to walk away and says sweetly over her shoulder,         
                                                                           
  'I guess it's to hang your pants on..'                                   
                                                                           
  (It's nice to see a blonde winning once in awhile.) 

 Bob works hard at the office but spends two nights each week bowling, and plays golf every Saturday.
   His wife thinks he's pushing himself too hard, so for his birthday 
 she takes him to a local strip club.
   The doorman at the club greets them and says, 'Hey, Bob! How ya doin?'
  His wife is puzzled and asks if he's been to this club before.
   'Oh no,' says Bob.  'He's in my bowling league.
   When they are seated, a waitress asks Bob if he'd like his usual and brings over a Budweiser.
  His wife is becoming increasingly uncomfortable and says, 'How did  she know that you drink Budweiser?'
  'I recognize her; she's the waitress from the golf club.
  I always have a Bud at the end of the 1st nine, honey.'
  A stripper then comes over to their table, throws her arms around Bob, starts to rub herself all over him & says, 'Hi Bobby. Want your usual lap dance, big boy?'
  Bob's wife, now furious, grabs her purse and storms out of the club.
  Bob follows and spots her getting into a cab.
Before she can slam the door, he jumps in beside her.
Bob tries desperately to explain how the stripper must have mistaken him for someone else, but his wife is having none of it. She is screaming at him at the top of her lungs, calling him every 4 letter word in the book.
  The cabby turns around and says,
'Geez Bob, you picked up a real bitch this time.'
   BOB's funeral will be on Friday.
 

       Two blonde girls were working for the city public works department. One
Would dig a hole and the other would follow behind her and fill the hole in.
They worked up one side of the street, then down the other, then moved on to
The next street, working furiously all day without rest, one girl digging a
Hole, the other girl filling it in again.

        An onlooker was amazed at their hard work, but couldn't understand what
They were doing. So he asked the hole digger, 'I'm impressed by the effort you
Two are putting in to your work, but I don't get it -- why do you dig a hole,
Only to have your partner follow behind and fill it up again?'

        The hole digger wiped her brow and sighed, 'Well, I suppose it probably
Looks odd because we're normally a three-person team. But today the girl who
Plants the trees called in sick.' 

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